Click here to visit Shefa Mehadrin's website
Click here to view JS's website
Add Kosherpages to your favourites
Make Kosherpages your home page


Manchester Eruv


Kosherpages Updates

March 05 Kosherpages launches 

December 05 - KP goes national.

June 06 - KP launches business networking events

January 07 - 1st B2B tradeshow

January 08 - 1st Kosher Lifestyle Show

August 08 - Parent & child networking event at the Odeon Manchester

September 08
- Launch of new film review section

September 08 - KP announces The Fed as chosen charity for this year

November 08 - Launch of new Medical Blog By Dr. Martin Harris

March 09 - Kosher Lifestyle Show Manchester

March 09 - Launch of The Kosher Brochure

May 10 - New Owners of KosherPages

June 10 - New look KosherPages

July 10 - KosherPages expands to include Jewish communities nation wide

July 10 - Pick of the Week is introduced to KosherPages - A joke, a quote, a Dvar Torah and more

August 10 - KosherPages now has a Facebook group - come and join us!

November 10 - Your health matters is added to KosherPages

November 10 - New addition to KosherPages - Kosher Fitness column

January 11 - KosherPages introduces "Your Pix" to Pick of the Week

July 11 - Safety First section is added to KosherPages

November 11 - The KosherPages Facebook group reaches 1,000 members

November 11 - KosherPages introduces the monthly competition

March 12 - KosherPages introduces new style "Shabbos Times & More" email. Click here to subscribe.




Do you have a joke you would like to share on KosherPages?

If so we would love to include it, please use our contact form to send it through to us.


Thursday, 15th March 2018

Forgetful ...

Thursday, 8th March 2018

Three sisters, ages 92, 94 and 96, lived in a house together.

One night the 96-year-old filled a bath. She put her foot in and paused. 
She yelled to the other sisters, 'Was I getting in or out of the bath?' 

The 94-year-old yelled back, 'I don't know. I'll come up and see.' 
She started up the stairs and paused, 'Was I going up the stairs or down? 

The 92-year-old sitting at the kitchen table having tea listening to her 2 sisters, shook her head and said, 'I sure hope I never get that forgetful, knock on wood.' 

She then yelled, 'I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door.'

Purim Joke!

Wednesday, 28th February 2018

It's not widely known, but ancient Persia was the origin of eastern mysticism, and it's thought that Mordechai (of the Book of Esther) was the person responsible for bringing these beliefs into the Jewish mainstream.

After Mordechai learned of the plot against King Achashverosh and fingered the would-be assassins, he became very afraid for the safety of Queen Esther so he began praying for her, fasting five days a week, going barefoot, and wearing sack-cloth. When he did eat, he only ate grains and certain vegetables.

Since Shushan was located in the foothills of the mountains, the ground was fairly rocky so Mordechai developed an impressive set of calluses on his feet.

His constant fasting soon made him quite frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.

So Mordechai had become......a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.


Friday, 23rd February 2018


click here to watch funny video

Prank call!

Thursday, 15th February 2018

A Chassideshe Guy Calles Up Some Company

and Trys to contact his friend Chaim Mordche Brecher.

The Jewish Chassid Cant Spell.

Its a really funny jewish prank call. 

Click here to listen to the call.


Thursday, 8th February 2018

A fellow stopped at a rural gas station and, after filling his tank, he paid the bill and bought a soft drink. He stood by his car to drink his cola and he watched a couple of men working along the roadside.

One man would dig a hole two or three feet deep and then move on. The other man came along behind and filled in the hole. While one was digging a new hole, the other was about 25 feet behind filling in the old.

"I can't stand this," said the man tossing the can in a trash container and heading down the road toward the men.

"Hold it, hold it," he said to the men. "Can you tell me what's going on here with this digging?"

"Well, we work for the county government," one of the men said.

"But one of you is digging a hole and the other is filling it up. You're not accomplishing anything. Aren't you wasting the county's money?"

"You don't understand, mister," one of the men said, leaning on his shovel and wiping his brow. "Normally there's three of us--me, Rodney and Mike. I dig the hole, Rodney sticks in the tree and Mike here puts the dirt back."

"Yea," piped up Mike. "Now just because Rodney's sick, that don't mean we can't work, does it?"

It's the tortoise life for me!

Thursday, 1st February 2018

As I was lying in bed pondering the problems of my weight, I rapidly realized that I don't really care two hoots!

It's the tortoise life for me!

1.  If walking/cycling is good for your health, the postman would be immortal.
2.  A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water, and is fat.
3.  A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 15 years.
4.  A tortoise doesn't run and does nothing, yet it lives for 450 years.

And you tell me to exercise??  I don't think so.

The new zookeeper!

Thursday, 25th January 2018

A bloke starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks.  First is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds.  
As he does this a huge fish jumps out and bites him. To show who is boss, he beats it to death with a spade.
Realising his employer won't be best pleased he disposes of the fish by feeding it to the lions, as lions will eat anything.
Moving on to the second job of clearing out the Chimp house, he is attacked by the chimps who pelt him with coconuts.
He swipes at two chimps with a spade killing them both.  What can he do?  Feed them to the lions, he says to himself, because lions eat anything.
He hurls the corpses into the lion enclosure.
He moves on to the last job which is to collect honey from the South American Bees.  As soon as he starts he is attacked by the bees. 

He grabs the spade and smashes the bees to a pulp.  By now he knows what to do and shovels them into the lions cage because lions eat anything.
Later that day a new lion arrives at the zoo.  He wanders up to another lion and says "What's the food like here?"
The lions say: "Absolutely brilliant, today we had Fish and Chimps with Mushy Bees."

The argument!

Thursday, 18th January 2018

A husband and wife were involved in a petty argument, both of them unwilling to admit they might be in error.

"I'll admit I'm wrong," the wife told her husband in a conciliatory attempt, "if you'll admit I'm right."

He agreed and, like a gentleman, insisted she go first."I'm wrong," she said. 
With a twinkle in his eye, he responded, "You're right!".

Get together ...

Wednesday, 10th January 2018